What lies beyond
by SophH
Summary: Set during season 4. A lost memory returns , leading Buffy down a dangerous path where not everything is as it seems.
1. Lost before the dawn

**Prologue **

**Lost before the dawn **

_At first she thought it was just a dream. _

_The mass of swirling shapes and colours flickering before her eyelids, teasing her with the sense of familiarity but never taking solid form. The blonde groaned in her sleep, unconsciously reaching out a hand to try and reach the objects that danced just beyond her grasp. _

"_It is time" _

_The softly spoken words barely even registered to the girl, too intent on catching the achingly familiar items. _

_The first thing that slowly reached her was scent. The lavender smell wrapped around her and filled her up as she breathed in delighted breaths. The scent sent a cherished sensation of safety and security coursing through her body, a feeling that had often eluded her since she had turned fifteen. Her hand dropped from it's out stretched position to grab a fistful of blankets as she buried herself into her bed, desperate to cling to the feeling. _

"_Lose yourself child" _

_The voice made her delve deeper into the covers. Only a few blonde strands were left visible to anyone who might have walked in at that point, as the girl's senses suddenly became overwhelmed by objects and sensations that had seemed to solidify out of nowhere around her. _

_A mahogany dresser, its surfaces still smelling of varnish and covered in photos of a woman gliding on ice. Giant stuffed animals, staring up at her, goofy plastic grins sewn tightly onto their pink fur and the most delicious sensation of sinking into a bed several sizes too big. A slow smile spread across the child's face as the soft sheets seemed to envelop her, encase her in a world where everybody smiled and everybody laughed. _

_But with the delightful scents and objects also came other sensations that shouldn't have been so familiar to the small girl that now laid trembling in the covers. _

_Harsh voices seemed to tear through the wooden door and whipped around the room, stealing the warmth that had, until moments ago, cloaked the room. The sharp crack of flesh hitting flesh soon followed making the girl gasp and tears instantly spring to green eyes. She tried to hold back the sobs that threatened to spill over, the effort making her tiny frame shake. _

_She laid there for what seemed like hours, now wanting the dream to end as much as she had wanted to cling to it's presence at the start. Small whimpers forced themselves from out her throat, as she continued to relive the horror of her parent's arguments. _

_After some while though the inevitable happened. It ended how it had always ended._

_The front door slammed, shaking the glass from inside it's frame and soon after the sound of her mom's sobs began to echo around the now quiet house. _

_The girl wanted to get up then. To run to her mummy and receive comfort she so desperately craved as well as give it. But she remained rooted to the spot, knowing that her mum would be more distressed with the knowledge that her little girl had heard the disturbance.. And so she held herself still, her body now rigid with the force of trying to keep herself quiet. _

_After some time the girl heard her mum's sobs slow to hiccups and soon after, the soft padded steps of her mum's slippers against the thick carpet that covered the hallway outside her room. The sound stopped just outside, making the girl close her eyes and force her breathing into what she hoped was a sleeping pattern. The ritual was now nearly over. _

_The door never opened. It never did, and soon she heard the footsteps retreating back down the hall and then the small almost inaudible click of her parent's door closing behind her mother. She let out the small sigh of breathe she hadn't realised she had been holding. Another night had past, the darkness bringing out the true nature of her family. In the morning her father would be back and they could all go through the motions of being a happy family living in the sunshine state of California. _

_The girl settled back into her covers, sleepiness now seeping through her limbs as the tense atmosphere of moments before slipped away. Eyes began to flicker closed but just before sleep claimed the girl a movement in the corner of her room caught her attention. Slowly she began to sit up, wariness in her movements as she eyed the TV set that sat upon a little desk on the opposite side of her room. _

_The enticing show of black and white dots that danced upon the screen beckoned to the girl, hypnotising her, despite her wariness, to crawl slowly out of her warm and safe covers and edge her way cautiously closer to the set. Her bare feet made no noise on the thick carpet, in unison with the eerily quiet atmosphere that had suddenly captured the house. Even the motorway sounds a short distance away seemed muffled and far away to the girl whose wide green eyes were fixed on the small screen. Finally she reached the TV, an arm unconsciously reaching out to touch the small display. A shot of static ripped through her making her jerked backwards and the TV short circuit. A blank screen now stared back at the girl showing her, her own frightened expression in reflection. _

_A frown formed on her forehead as her breathing hitched, turning to hyperventilation. She whipped round, the sensation of someone watching her completely taking her over. Darkness greeted the girl, the shadowy substance seeming to take a life of it's own as it sucked at the small glow of the streetlight that made it inside her room._

"_Mummy" she whimpered, small sobs beginning to shake her body. Her eyes jerked around the room as she tried to find the source of the fear now coursing through her veins. _

_Whipping her body around again, her frightened state heightened as she caught a glimpse of a figure staring at her from the bedroom window. _

_A gasp was torn from her lips and she stumbled backwards. The faceless man stared back at her, not moving a muscle as he stood on the slanted roof that resided just outside her window. _

_Moments ticked by, each second lengthening to impossibly long minutes as girl and man stared at each other, neither moving, fear paralysing one and patience the other. Eventually her body began to relax, tense muscles loosening up as child's curiosity took over. Creeping warily forward, one foot being placed carefully on the floor before she took another step, she made her way over to her window. The man made no other movement except to tilt his head down slowly as she made her approach and again, made braver by the man's lack of movement, the child found her arm reaching out as if to touch the suited leg of the man. _

_A loud bang had her retracting her arm quickly back inside her window just before she could make contact and surprised she took a hasty step back as the source of the noise dropped down in front of her. _

_The faceless man was gone. _

_In his place crouched the pale form of another man, this one smaller and a scowl adoring his face. _

"_Bugger, almost had him" the male voice rumbled out, almost too low for the blonde to catch the words. _

_She stared at the newcomer, fear subsiding as she took on the appearance of the man before her. White blonde hair and too pale skin stood out in sharp contrast to the black leather draped around his shoulders. Seemingly oblivious to her presence the man fumbled in his coat pocket, eventually pulling out a cigarette and silver lighter and quickly lighting up. The flare from the cigarette briefly lit up the man's face giving her a view of sharp blue eyes that suddenly turned their gaze onto her. _

"_Should be in bed pet" he drawled. "All safe and sound wrapped up in your covers" another puff on the cigarette, but she could have sworn she heard a low growl sound from the man. Unconsciously a shiver ran through her, body screaming danger._

_She took a step forward, her body now pressed against the windowsill again. "Mister? You shouldn't smoke those. They're bad for you" she spoke confidently, her body's instinct to run being overrun by childish confidence. Briefly she saw surprise flicker across the man's face before a smirk pulled at the corners of his mouth. _

_Casually he flicked the almost spent cigarette away and she felt her eyes drawn to the path of light that it created in the darkness. A low rumble brought her attention back to the man, finding him now standing up, shadows masking him from her so it was impossible to tell what emotion was passing across his face._

"_Is that right pet" another rumbled sounded from the man. A sound she was quickly beginning to take as the man's chuckle. _

_She only nodded staring up at the man in interest. "You're shorter than the other one" she remarked._

_The man's chuckle stopped abruptly. If she could see his face she knew the smirk that had appeared earlier would have been wiped off at her remark. He was silent for a long time, so long she began to wonder if he had heard her at all. "Miste…" she began but was suddenly forced backwards as the man appeared crouched down in front of her window, blue eyes gazing at her, piecing her with their seriousness. _

_Another tremble swept through her body. "M…mister?" she tried again. _

"_Did you see him? The man, before? In the suit?" The questions came out in a rush, impatience lacing his tone. Slowly she nodded, lower lip trembling as she took another step backwards. _

_A definite growl was ripped from the man this time as he stood up just as suddenly as he had appeared. "Bollocks" he muttered. As he started to pace along the roof, she backed up several steps, legs nearly buckling as they hit the foot of her bed. Silent tremors shook her body as fearful green eyes kept track of the man's movements. He was beginning to scare her, the danger vibe that had been squashed by curiosity returning in full force. _

_Abruptly he stopped, swirling around, eyes searching for hers. Blue eyes boring into green. _

"_Stay away from him" he said before sweeping around and jumping off her roof, leaving nothing but the faint smell of cigarette smoke behind. _

_She stood paralysed for several moments, nails biting into the wood behind her and breathe coming in ragged gasps. The night had elicited many surprises for the young girl. A safe world suddenly being revealed to hold something more. Something dangerous. _

_Another tremor ran the length of her body before she slowly shook herself out of the paralysing fear she had been in. Making her way back over to the window, she scanned the landscape quickly before slamming the window shut. The look revealed no more than the normal suburban California night but she moved quickly back to her bed locking her covers tightly around her. Fearful eyes gazed out from behind the comforter, gaze sweeping her bedroom, locking onto shadows determining them safe before moving onto the next corner. The night revealed no more surprise visitors however and soon the events caught up with the child whose eyes began to droop shut. A tiny fist closed around the comforter before she finally fell oblivious to the world and the pale face that appeared in the corner. _

Gasping awake, she abruptly sat up, sweat clinging to her body and tremors shaking her form.

"B..Buffy?" the sleepy voice sounded from the bed next to her. Willow slowly sat up turning on the sidelight while rubbing sleep from her eyes. "Buffy?" she repeated.

Slowly she turned to look at her friend, forcing a smile on her face. "Just a bad dream, Will. Go back to sleep."

The red head continued to look at her strangely for a few seconds but decided it could wait until morning. The light turned off as Willow's head hit the pillow, sleep already again claiming the girl. Buffy stared into the darkness. Distant music could be heard from the dorms above but she paid no heed, the dream still fresh in her mind.

"Just a dream" she murmured. _No, _she shook her head. _A memory._

* * *

**So this is just a preview, the rest of the story won't be uploaded for a good while yet. Beta now found so hopefully chapters will come a bit faster :D**

**Hoped you enjoyed **

**SophH**


	2. Meet me after dark again

**Dear reader,**

**Hope you all enjoyed the prologue! Now a little introduction to this fic of mine. It shall be set in season 4 and start at some point in-between episodes 2 and 3. Any other queries feel free to PM me. I'm hoping to update at least once every week or two but I'm not a very fast writer and do have a lot of exams at the minute so I do apologize if I'm really late with an update however I'm really going to make an effort to update on a regular schedule. Of course I love hearing what you guys think be it positive or negative so please leave a review, they really are helpful for the writer. **

**Lastly a big thank-you to my Beta Callie8M for her patience and helpful advice and also to WintersBlueRaven for encouraging me to write in the first place and her continued support. Well that just about wraps things up, please enjoy Chapter 1!**

**SophH**

* * *

**Chapter 1  
Meet me after dark again**

The heat oozed into the classroom, spreading over the students like a thick sauce. Open windows did little to sooth the climate and most of the class were sat dozing, eyes barely staying open as they tried lazily to fan themselves with their thick notes.  
Buffy wasn't an exception to the rule. Head leaning on her hands she tried desperately to listen to the droning voice of Dr Walsh whose enthusiasm for the subject did not seemed to be dampened by the weather. She however found her mind more often than not, despite trying desperately to concentrate on the subject, wandering back to the dream… no, memory, she had awoken from this morning. Shivers still shook her body as she thought about the faceless man peering in at her through the window but what confused her even more though was the presence of Spike.

What had he been doing there, on her roof when she was barely 8 yrs old?

Was he chasing the tall suited man?

Why didn't he try to attack her?

All these questions and more had been chasing themselves around her brain all morning and she still found herself no closer to the answer. But the most confusing of all, the one that had wigging her out since she had woken up.  
Why didn't she remember?

She had tried frantically all her life to forget her parent's arguments and yet this memory, the one that could have been of some importance, her mind had decided to completely blank until last night. Confused by the whole ordeal she found her mind wandering off yet again on the same route it had taken all morning. Going over every encounter she had had with the infamous vampire, she tried to think of some clue that he remembered her or that night at all. She found herself coming up blank however. Every meeting, he had acted as though they had just met on that dark night in an alley behind The Bronze. Slayer and vampire, out to kill each other. Of course she was only 8 years old and had probably changed a good deal but there was some part of her, a very small part, that was kind of disappointed he hadn't remembered. Trying to squash the feeling down she turned back to look at the open textbook in front of her, it was Spike after all, crazed lunatic vampire who only deserved a bit of pointy wood through the heart.

A sharp nudge in her ribs suddenly brought the blonde out of her thoughts.  
"Ow" she started but then noticed Willow sitting next to her giving her pointed looks before inclining her head towards the front of the class.  
Buffy turned her head to face the front and found Dr Walsh staring at her, eyebrows raised and lips set in a disapproving line.  
"As I was saying Miss Summers, although intimately related, sensation and perception play two complimentary but different roles in how we interpret our world. Sensation refers to the process of sensing our environment through touch, taste, sight, sound, and smell. This information is sent to our brains in raw form where perception comes into play. Perception is the way we interpret these sensations and therefore make sense of everything around us."

Buffy groaned, letting her head fall back into her hands, the whole class asleep and she's the one that gets noticed for her lack of attention.  
"So for homework, I want an essay on which of the five senses you would choose to lose and how it could alter your perception of the world around you" Walsh finished up waving a hand to dismiss the class before turning immediately to Riley, whispering urgently in his ear.  
Buffy narrowed her eyes in their direction, pen poised above her paper but not actually writing the homework down.  
Was it just her, or did the two of them have a more intimate relationship than what most professors and their TA's had?

A insistent poke brought her out of her musings for the second time that day.  
"Buffy?" Willow's voice called to her, confusion lacing her tone. Tearing her eyes away from watching the two adults down the front, she turned her attention back to Willow noticing the same frown that she had worn on her face ever since the red head had gotten up this morning.  
"Are you ok?" the red head asked, green eyes looking on at her with concern.  
"I'm fine Willow" Buffy plastered the best smile she could muster on her face hoping Willow would drop it. "Just easily distracted today it seems"  
Willow's eyes narrowed suspiciously, and opened her mouth to say something but was cut off by Dr Walsh's shrill tone.

"Miss Summers! Miss Rosenberg! Do you not have other places you need to be!"

The effect was immediate, Willow's cheeks flamed a red almost as bright as her hair as she hastily broke eye contact, hurrying to gather her books up from the desk.  
Buffy looked on with amusement, inwardly laughing at the effect a stern word from a teacher could have on her friend. Turning to gather her own books at a more sedate pace she gave one last look towards the professor and her TA once again deep in conversation, before following her friend out into the noisy hallway.

"Hey" Willow asked as soon as Buffy joined her. "You never did tell me about that dream you had last night?"  
The blonde groaned as she set off, her feet automatically taking her on the quickest route to her dorm room. "Because there's nothing to tell Will. Just a bad dream, nothing more." She kept her eyes looking ahead and dipped her head slightly making her hair act as a curtain between herself and the red head that walked beside her.  
Not deterred by the action, Willow persisted on. "Yeah that's why you're trying so hard to make me believe that"  
Buffy risked a glance at her friend and saw her stubborn face firmly in place. Turning her eyes back to the way she was going, she debated whether to just come out and tell Willow. What was really stopping her in any case? It was just an earlier memory that just happened to feature the vampire that had kidnapped Willow, forcing her to perform a spell and almost killing Xander and Cordelia in the process. Yeah that will go down well, she thought.

Thankfully she was saved from answering her friend as a bright yellow flyer was thrust in her face.

"Please!" the girl whose arm was attached to the flyer almost screamed at them. "Please! You've got to help me!"  
Buffy gave Willow a startled glance before turning back to the girl whose light blue eyes now looked manic, jerking between the two of them.  
"What's wrong?" Willow asked, stepping forward to try and calm the girl. At Willow's touch the girl broke down, tears streaming down her cheeks. "Pl…please. My sis…sis…sister"  
Giving Buffy a quick anxious look Willow slowly pried the flyer out of the girl's hand, passing it to Buffy before wrapping her arms around the girl.  
Taking the piece of paper out of habit more than anything, she gazed at the girl who was now uncontrollably sobbing and clinging to Willow as if her life depended on the grasp. She could swear she knew the girl, but the image she had in her head right now did not fit the image the girl was showing right now. She had always been impeccably dressed, hair secured in a tight bun without a blonde strand loose whereas the girl now had dressed sloppily in tracks and a large t-shirt that had several questionable stains on the front and the blonde hair now hung limp and greasy at her shoulders.

What on earth had happened to make the girl lose it so completely? Looking down at the piece of paper she found her reason. Most of the page was taken up by a large photo of a small girl, so similar to the blonde still sobbing in front of her that they had to be siblings. The girl, who couldn't be older than 5, cheekily grinned up at the camera from her position upon the small pony, blue eyes sparkling cheerfully. The words in a big bold font underneath read "HAVE YOU SEEN THIS GIRL?" followed simply by a mobile number and home address.

Her grip tightened ever so slightly on the flyer. Now she knew why the girl was so unlike herself and she honestly couldn't blame her for losing it. Her mind wandered to Dawn and the brief times her stubborn sister had runaway or got lost, Buffy hadn't exactly been in the state of mind to worry about her make up or getting her hair to wave just right. Sure her brown haired sister may drive her around the bend sometimes but she couldn't imagine a life without her.  
Tucking the flyer away she gazed at the girl, sympathy now showing in Buffy's eyes. Touching Willow's shoulder to get her attention, she indicated to the red head to move away. The girl's sobs had quietened a little but she still looked reluctant to part from Willow's comforting presence. Eventually though they managed to pry her fingers loose and Buffy turned to the girl, holding her head between her hands to make sure the girl was looking at her.  
"I'm sorry" Buffy uttered sadness evident in every syllable. "I haven't seen her. But I promise I will keep an eye for her everywhere I go."  
The girl stared back at her for a few seconds more tears threatening to fall. But the girl suddenly nodded, wiping angrily at her eyes she took a deep shaky breath. "Thank-you" she said barely above a whisper.  
Buffy smiled at her before extending a hand to help her up. Gratefully taking the proffered hand she uttered another quick thanks before hurrying off as she spotted another student hurrying by.  
Buffy watched her retreating figure for a few seconds still feeling sympathetic and slightly worried for the girl, but eventually shaking her head she turned back to Willow.

"Let's get…" she drew up short however when she saw the look on Willow's face . Her forehead was creased together in a large frown and her eyes were full of worry, like she sensed another impending apocalypse worry.  
"Willow?" Buffy questioned taking a step closer towards her friend.  
"Buffy" Willow's head snapped up to look at her, eyes widening as her mind thought of some unknown terror.  
"Willow what is it?" she asked genuine worry now starting to knot her stomach.  
"It's just, I don't know maybe I'm reading too much into things."  
"Willow tell me" she said sternly.  
"Well" Willow fiddled with the end of her blouse, hands knotting and un-knotting the fabric in her nervousness. "It's just that's the fifth missing person case I've heard of since starting Uni."  
Buffy felt her body relax at Willow's words. "Wills, we live on a Hellmouth and I may be the slayer but I can't save everyone"  
"No Buffy!" Willow exclaimed. "You don't understand! All the cases have been of kids under the age of six"  
Taken aback by Willow's reaction, the knot of worry began to edge it's way back into her system. She had to admit even for the Hellmouth that was strange statistics, usually it was adults disappearing as they were normally the only ones out at night when the demons emerged.  
"I need to talk to Giles before patrol tonight" she muttered almost to herself but she noticed the way tension visibly left Willow's shoulders. The mention of the Watcher always seemed to induce safety into the group, he always seemed to know what to do.  
"Come on" Buffy said while grabbing Willow's arm with hers. "We better get these essays done unless we seriously want to induce Dr Walsh's wrath"

* * *

Giles's sigh seemed to echo throughout the small apartment as the silence stretched on. Buffy looked on as her mentor took his glasses off his head rubbing tiredly at his eyes before he proceeded to clean the lenses vigorously. In the four years of knowing him she knew that this was a habit he had picked up when he was stressed and concerned about something.

_So Willow was right to be concerned, _she thought. After finishing her rounds in the first 5 cemeteries she had come straight to Giles's repeating her best friend's thoughts and concerns over the matter of missing kids.

"And you're sure they're all children under the age of 6?" Giles finally said after replacing his glasses back onto his head and fixing her with a piecing stare.

It was Buffy's turn to sigh. "Yes" she repeated for what seemed like the umpteenth time. "At least according to Willow"

Dropping his gaze and turning towards one of the many bookshelves in his home. "Well it seems we have another problem on our hands"

"You mean besides the fact that I've got to contend with an increasing vampire and demon population and somehow pass Psyche 101" Buffy retorted.

Giles looked at her in annoyance before opening the book he held. "It means that vampires are not our only problem here and whatever demon is causing this is good enough to snatch kids in daytime probably in plain sight of their parents"

Buffy frowned at his answer. She hadn't thought of that, in fact apart from taking the longer route through all the cemeteries of Sunnydale she hadn't taken this case seriously at all. But the thought that this thing, whatever it was, could be killing right under their noses shook her.

"Buffy" Giles's voice broke into her thoughts making her look up at her mentor. He was staring at her concern evidently written in his face while the book laid temporarily forgotten on the table. "This could be unlike anything you've faced before"

The blonde stared at the man who over the years had become not only her watcher but also, in some ways a father figure to her now her own father was completely absent from her life. His face was serious, _he is always serious, _she thought but this time there was no give in his blue eyes, the lines in his face set in a firm resolution. Obviously the involvement of children seemed to have shaken the man and the fact that this beast could do it in plain daylight, when they were supposed to be safe just added to the shock.

"I've been doing a thorough patrol tonight and nothing seems out of the ordinary, except a few more vamps then usual" she replied after some time trying to cut through the tension that had suddenly settled over the room like a blanket. It worked, something that looked suspiciously like pity flashed through Giles's eyes but he turned quickly back to the book before Buffy could be sure.

"Right. Well I'll research as much as I can here"

"Thanks Giles" she made a move to leave the apartment but was stopped by Giles's voice once again.

"Buffy, be careful"

She turned back to face him a smile playing on her lips. "Always am. Now I've got to go kick some vamp butt before heading back to dorms to work on a truly wonderful essay"

She was out the door before Giles could respond to her last comment. Setting a quick pace to get away her feet echoed in the silence of the night. She tried to concentrate on the sound, on the soothing effect the tapping rhythm had on her frazzled nerves. She had only been at college for a few weeks and already the work was piling up on her. If now she had to include daylight patrols into her routine she honestly didn't know if she would be able to cope.

_I wonder if Willow knows a spell that would allow me to be in multiple places at once, _she mused. Sighing again for what seemed like the thousandth time that night she ran a hand through the blonde strands of her hair, trying to detangle the knots that had appeared from a night of slaying. It was only then that she took notice of her surroundings. The sun disappearing behind the horizon had not eased the temperature much and she was already covered in a fine layer of sweat, just from walking from Giles's cool air conditioned apartment to the entrance to Restfield cemetery where she now stood eyes looking around her with a troubled expression. It was quiet, not the quiet of a still peaceful night that the town was sometimes blessed with but the kind that made your hair stand up on end and had you looking over your shoulder every few seconds, sure that someone or thing was following you. Edging cautiously into the graveyard she kept her eyes peeled, the night seeming darker than usual.

Every instinct in her body was telling her something was up, that something was waiting out there on the fringes on her vision, hovering but never showing itself. Muscles tensed up in response as she made her way, zigzagging through the graves, but the night was as quiet as ever.

That was another unusual thing Buffy couldn't help but note. Restfield was one of the larger cemeteries in Sunnydale, her normal route taking her through the area every night and every night there was usually at least a couple of vampires lurking. But the silenced spread on, seeming to encompass the surrounding area with it's thick blanketing presence.

_This is wrong, _she thought turning her body around and straining her eyes for something, a flash of movement, the slightest sound. Anything.

The first tingles of fear began to creep through Buffy's body, her breathing becoming faster as her legs picked up her pace until she was jogging along the paths that intertwined through the graves. The Slayer didn't spook easy and Buffy was no exception, almost 4 years on the job and she had thought she had seen everything, even dying once, if only for a minute. But this night swept chills through her body.

_Dr Walsh was right, _the blonde thought back to the lecture earlier today. _Being without senses really freaked her out and this was only when her sight and hearing seemed a little dulled. Imagine if I went blind or deaf completely. _A shiver shook her body at the thought, it was entirely possible in her line of work, even with the advanced healing.

So caught up in her thoughts and the chilling feeling of fear running through her she almost missed the flash of something bright amongst the darkness. Forcing her limbs to stop their pounding on the gravel, she skidded to a halt, green eyes fixed on what seemed like the only light in the night.

Before, all her gut instincts had been telling her to run, to get as far away from the dark night as possible but now as she stood fixated on the point her mind screaming at her to go forward. Yet she stayed paralyzed on the gravel path, limbs frozen in position, as still as the stone statues that stood guardian over the graves.

_Go! _The silky voice almost seemed to growl at her but Buffy hardly registered, eyes still glued to the small patch of white. The word seemed to work though, her legs automatically obeying the voice, whoever it belonged to.

Gradually getting closer she noticed that the she had only been afforded a glimpse of the object from the path, the rest of it hidden behind the crypt that stood in the most shadowed part of the graveyard.

_No! _Buffy eyes suddenly widened and her pace quickened till she was almost sprinting. _That wasn't an object. That was hair! _The pale blonde strands had reflected the moonlight almost making it glow a white that had attracted her attention in the first place.

Rounding the corner of the crypt her body came to a screeching halt at the sight of the person… no demon before her. Blood covered most of the side of his face although where it had originated from Buffy couldn't tell. _Probably the wound has already healed up, _she thought scanning the rest of the still form lying before her.

Buffy's breathing hitched as she remembered the dream she had the night before. Was it a coincidence? Living on the Hellmouth had taught her, nothing was a coincidence. Yet what could this mean?

She was ripped from her thoughts as the body before her began to move and a groan escaped his lips. She stood perfectly still, her mind telling her not the reach for the stake in her pocket despite the vampire chills that shook her system were yelling at her to do so. If the dream was real though and it was in fact a memory, he hadn't attacked her that night all those years ago. True he hadn't been able to get at her without an invite but he hadn't even tried to get in.

Buffy's mind was in a dilemma, she was the Slayer and here laid a vampire weakened and in no shape to fight back. She knew her duty and it was a perfect opportunity to dust another Master vamp and yet her hand stayed limp by her side, the stake untouched in her pocket.

Slowly the vampire before her opened his eyes, gradually taking in the surroundings before eventually his gaze came to a rest on her feet standing stiffly in the grass and he lifted his head to finally look her in the eyes. Confusion, malice and then something that almost looked like wariness played out on his face before he finally growled out. "Slayer"

"Spike" was all Buffy said in return her gaze equally locked on his.

* * *

**To be continued in Chapter 2: Crave my heart**


	3. Crave my heart

**A brief note - **Thank you to all who have reviewed so far, means so much that you are enjoying this story and find it interesting. Thanks guys, you all rock!

**Beta - **Callie8M

* * *

**Previously – **Waking up from a dream that she soon discovers is actually a memory, Buffy finds that little kids have been disappearing all around town. To add to the troubles while out on patrol she comes across an unconscious Spike, the very vampire who she may have had a longer connection with than she previously thought.

**Chapter 2 **

**Crave my heart **

She didn't know how long she stood there staring down at the vampire that still laid at her feet. It could have been seconds or it could have been hours. All she knew was that slowly the rational thought was leaving her mind as anger began to seep throughout her body.

Dream or no dream this creature that laid on the dirt at her feet, had caused her so much pain. Kidnapping her two best friends and hurting them both physically and emotionally, kidnapping Angel and torturing him to get his own selfish way and finally, she had trusted him once only to be betrayed at his earliest convenience. There was barely any trust there but she had to admit to herself now, she had put her faith in him that night, depended on him. If he had stayed, if he hadn't had left as soon as he could, then maybe things might have turned out differently. Maybe there could have been another way to close the gate or she might have been able to defeat him sooner so she wouldn't have to remember his face, eyes full of betrayal as he was torn away from her. The memory still burned in her mind like acid, eating away at her conscious as those eyes full of betrayal looked at her before he was finally consumed by the gateway.

She couldn't blame herself, she had tried that and she had barely coped, running away and surviving the best she could, the best she could allow herself to.

So she blamed him, the creature with no soul, no ability to feel anything good. Buffy's eyes glared down at him bile beginning to rise in her throat as if even thinking about him was poisonous to her. Not one sound was uttered between them, the graveyard deathly silent, appropriate for the scene as each being eyed each other up, muscles tensed in readiness as they waited for the other to make the first move.

It was Spike to make the first move. Wincing slightly he never the less kept his eyes on the glaring Slayer before him as he slowly maneuvered himself into a standing position, although he had to lean against the side of the crypt as one of his legs almost gave way under the strain.

"Well well. What a pleasant surprise" he ground out a slight smirk appearing on his face.

The low voice seemed to act like a trigger in Buffy's brain, unlocking her frozen limbs. Rushing forward she grabbed the vampire by the throat slamming him against the crypt wall, she smiled satisfied as she heard him grimaced as his head rebounded off the hard stone.

"What in hell are you doing here Spike?!"

Blue eyes stared down at her innocently. "Just popped by for a visit" he smirked. "You know see how the old gang was getting along."

Buffy's blood boiled at his words, one fist clenched painfully at her sides while the other tightened considerably around his throat.

"I thought I told you, I would kill you if you ever showed your ugly face here again!"

Mock hurt flashed across his face before his smirk grew wider. "Aw and I thought you and I were beginning to get along"

Her anger overflowed at that annoyingly calm voice. Whipping her body around, she tossed the vampire away from her and sending him flying through the air until he crashed against the trees lining the cemetery's edge. The resounding crack of bark and bone echoed throughout the quiet expanse.

Buffy smirked at the sound, _good, _she thought.

"Let me guess" she said while casually walking over to the barely conscious vampire. The move had got rid of some of her anger but her hands still itched to maim something. "Drusilla dumped your pathetic ass and now you've come crawling back for some help"

Finally she got some reaction out of him as anger contorted his features. Eyes sparked dangerously, the fog clearing from his mind as he hauled himself to his feet.

_Crunch!_

Buffy's fist collided with his nose, blood spurting out to cover her hand and spatter her face as the vampire once again fell to the ground. Her own features were also shifted into malice, the casual air completely gone as the Slayer took over. Raising her hand once again to knock him out once and for all a flash of white in the corner of her eyes caught her attention for the second time that night.

Glancing up she came to see the second figure of her dream standing barely a hundred meters away, still as the surrounding night as his pale featureless face stared at the two of them.

"What the…" she murmured eyes fixed on the tall man, the vampire for the time being completely forgotten.

Dazed, Spike was finally able to stop seeing double. Lifting his gaze up wondering why the Slayer hadn't thrown another punch yet he found her paralyzed, fist raised to strike him again yet her body twisted around, eyes firmly staring off at something in the distance. Following her gaze he however couldn't see what was so interesting to her, just the usual few scattered graves surrounded by the willow trees by the river.

"Slayer?" he questioned but got no response. It was as if she was suddenly made of stone, no ability to move, she didn't even look like she was breathing.

_Well, you shouldn't question your luck, _he thought as he held firmly onto the tree behind him to haul himself to his feet for the third time that night. He ground his teeth together as pain shot through his limbs. _Bitch broke my ribs… and my nose!_

He didn't have a clue what had pissed her off so much tonight but he wasn't going to stick around to ask her. Taking a breathe he tried to take a step forward, gingerly putting slight weight on his previously broken leg. It buckled underneath his full weight making him slump to the ground. "Damn demon!"he growled out. In the time he had been unconscious it had knitted together wrong, the bone at such an angle that it was now no longer able to support his frame at all.

His words and noisy collapse had finally caught the Slayer's attention though and she slowly turned her body around to face his, anger clouding her eyes.

_This is gonna hurt, _he thought as she readied her fist.

But before she could make another move her eyes widened in fear before she too slumped to the ground, hands clutching her head and screaming in agony.

Spike's own eyes widened at the sight, watching in amazement at the slayer now writhing on the ground, as if shock after shock of electricity was being pumped into her body. He could see her eyes rolling into the back of her head showing only the look of maddened whites staring out in pain at the world. Spike didn't know how long he sat there in too much shock to either move to aid or flee but eventually the seizing girl slumped forward, tangled blonde hair falling to cover her face and only the occasional twitch shuddering through her body as she passed out.

"What in hell?!"

* * *

Buffy groaned, eyelids flickering open only to be soon snapped shut again as sunlight assaulted her pupils.

"Well look who decided to wake up finally"

The too chirper voice hurt her ears everything seeming 10x louder and brighter than it should have been and her head throbbing painfully just added to the list of reasons why she just wanted to crawl back under her covers, never to emerge again.

Before she could act on that idea though the mattress shifted underneath her as she felt someone sit down on the end and a warm enticing aroma hit her nostrils. Peeking from underneath her cover she blinked in the harsh light before eventually focusing on Willow trying to suppress a laugh as she waved coffee in her direction. Moaning she chucked a pillow at the smiling girl but none the less took the offered drink gratefully.

"Thanks Will, you've no idea how much I need this"

"Well if you feel anything like you look, I'd say pretty badly" Willow replied getting up from her perch on the bed to grab the pillow that had fallen on the floor.

Buffy glared at her from over the rim of the cup. "What time is it anyway?"

"Nearly 3pm. What happened last night? I didn't even hear you get in"

"I…" She sat bolt upright as some of the fog cleared from her brain and she remembered last night's events. "Spike, he… I…"

"Spike?!" Willow's voice rose an octave higher at the sound of the name. "But I thought you said he was gone for good this time?"

"Believe me I wish that was true. But I… he was definitely there. I remember…" She struggled to recall the details, each time she thought she was remembering a detail her head would throb painfully and she would lose her train of thought. What had happened last night?

"Do you not remember?" Willow's voice was back to being timid, a slight tremble of fear wavered in it as she clutched the pillow tighter in her grasp.

Dropping her head tiredly into her hands and rubbing her eyes, she attempted to get back the images that still remained surrounded in the fog.

"I was patrolling out at Restfield and I remembered something not feeling right, everything just seemed darker and more… creepy" she started but failing to come up with a better word to describe the atmosphere that had encompassed the cemetery.

"Darker and creepier than a graveyard at night?"

"More than usual" Buffy agreed. "Then I found Spike. He was unconscious, just lying there behind a crypt looking like he had gone ten rounds with one of them horned demon things"

"Fyarl demon?" Willow offered.

"Yeah one of those. Anyway he woke up and I gave his ass a well-deserved kicking, trying to find out what he was doing back here… and then nothing."

"Nothing?"

"None, zilch, nada, zero" Buffy sighed once again dropping her head into her hands.

"What about getting back? You remember that… right?"

"Err, am I interrupting?" An amused voice sounded from the doorway.

Buffy's head snapped up as did Willow's. "Dawn?! What are you doing here?"

"Nice to see you too sis" Dawn replied, smiling cheekily at her sister before sauntering over to sit on Willow's bed. "I came to see you before heading to a friend's. Is that a crime now?"

"No but…" Carefully she gazed at her sister; her long brown hair was curled loosely instead of in its usual straight style, the clothes she had worn Buffy knew were impeccably chosen to show off her maturing figure (much as Buffy hated to admit, her little sister was growing up) and her makeup, Buffy could just imagine the hours she had spent in the mirror this morning carefully applying each product until she had got it just right.

"Who's this friend of yours?"

Dawn rolled her eyes at her sister's scrutiny. "Just the new transfer student, she asked me to show her around town today" she practically glowed with pride at the end of the sentence.

Buffy heaved a sigh of relief, well at least she wouldn't have to be worried about guys, for today at least.

"That's nice but Dawnie, I really need to get going" Buffy said, emerging from her covers and walking over to her closet.

"Right, of course. I'm gone." Dawn slid her figure off the bed and stalked back out of the room, head held high as she passed the other two females.

The sound of her high heeled boots could be heard disappearing down the hallway, Willow waited till the last step faded away before turning to face Buffy. "Umm, Buffy?"

"What's up Will?" Buffy asked while still flittering through her clothes, deciding what to wear that day.

"Why are you still in yesterday's clothes?"

Buffy looked down at herself and indeed she was still clad in yesterday's t-shirt and jeans, blood still spattered across the fabric evidence that last night had really happened. Even her right hand was still covered in the dried blood that she had obtained when she had smashed Spike's nose in.

_Urgh how had she slept like this and how had she not even noticed till now?_

"Ew, I need to take a shower first"

"I'll say" Willow smiled briefly but it soon disappeared off her face. "But you have no memory of getting back this morning?"

She shook her head. She wanted to remember but the throbbing of her head just couldn't take it right now. "No, the last thing I remember is smashing Spike in the face and then the next thing I know is waking up here"

Willow gulped eyes showing her fear; for once she seemed lost for words.

Buffy turned herself away from her wardrobe and put a comforting hand on her friend's shoulder. "Look, I'll grab a shower and then we'll go speak to Giles. He said he was going to research the kid thing anyhow so maybe he'll have something for us about that."

Willow gave a wobbling smile in return before gulping in a large mouthful of air. "Yeah okay, cool. We'll do that. Oh and shouldn't we pick up Xander on the way, you know he gets cranky when he's left out the loop"

"Sure thing. I think he'll appreciate the time out of his parent's basement as well"

* * *

Soon enough the three of them were treading along the same route Buffy had taken last night, minus all the cemetery excursions of course. The sun hadn't lost any of its heat, and if possible seemed even hotter than the previous day.

"So you're saying kids are disappearing all over town even during the day and the Buffster meets up with blond wonder vamp last night but doesn't even remember getting home?" Xander summed up as he trotted along beside his two best friends. He didn't seemed to be affected by the heat at all, but seemed over joyed by the fact that they had come and got him to fill him in on the details.

"Yeah that sounds about right" Buffy agreed. Unlike Xander the heat was beginning to get to her. The shower previously had done little to refresh her aching body and what frustrated her the most was the fact she couldn't remember why she should be aching.

"Well they sure don't do things by halves on the Hellmouth. So what's the theory guys?"

"We don't know, hence the visit to Giles" Willow spoke up while peeking from underneath her giant hat. Her skin being sensitive to the sun, Willow was struggling most with the intense heat that had consumed Sunnydale over the past week.

"Right, but it's got to be Spike, I mean he was the only one about when… well when whatever the hell went on"

Buffy frowned in thought. "I don't know, he was pretty beat up even before I found him and then after the thrashing I gave him…" she trailed off as her head began to hurt thinking about the events.

"Well Giles will know something" Willow pointed out.

"Of course, he's Giles, he's the man when it comes to research" Xander stopped dead in his tracks a sudden look of horror on his face. "We're not gonna have to research right?"

The two girls smiled before continuing on. "Right?!" Xander called after them. "Damn it"

Rounding the corner they finally came to Giles's door. Ringing the doorbell they heard a series of loud thumps followed by a murmured curse before finally they heard him shout out. "Be right there!"

The door opened to reveal a rather flustered looking Giles standing in the doorway, hair messed up and clothes rumpled with what looked like to be several tea stains on them.

"Um, hi Giles, got a moment?" Buffy repressed a chuckle at her mentor looking in such a state.

"Buffy… Of course, come in come in. I was just researching the situation you gave me last night" he said while holding the door wide to allow the three of them entrance.

The place was a complete mess. Buffy stared in open mouth amazement at the scattered books, half still lying open with pages of paper scribbled with notes tuck into them. What remaining space that was left was taken up by an array of teacups each one developing a little brown rim where the tea level had started out at.

"Whoa, carried away much?" Xander said, while carefully stepping around the mess.

"What? Oh yes... I have a bit haven't I?"

"I'll say, Giles what is all this?" This time Willow spoke up.

"I was researching the missing kids issue and I've just seemed to have… lost track of time."

Buffy maneuvered herself around the books to sit on one of the few seats that weren't covered in books. "Yeah and we've got more to add to that issue."

That caught Giles's attention immediately. "Another kid was taken?"

"Thankfully no, at least not as far as we know. No just after I left yours I went to Restfield cemetery and met up with Spike"

"Spike?" Now she really had Giles's interest, slowly he sank down onto one of the side tables, not even noticing that he had sat on a stack of papers, his eyes firmly glued on Buffy's.

"The one and only. I found him lying unconscious behind a crypt. Looked like he had taken a pretty bad beating as well"

"Well this is bad news" Giles said, already taking off his glasses to begin their first of probably many cleans to come.

"I'm sorry what? What part of Spike being beaten is bad news?" Xander spoke up looking appalled at the thought.

"Well we know that he's quite a good fighter so whatever got him must be pretty adept themselves. Dumping the body while still alive also shows intelligence, could be quite possible they were setting a trap"

"Oh that could be why Buffy doesn't remember getting back last night?" Willow exclaimed excitedly.

Giles's eyes snapped back to Buffy's who looked down guiltily. Why did she always feel like a little girl getting told off when he looked at her like that? "Is this true Buffy?"

She nodded. "All I remember is fighting Spike and then the next thing is I woke up back in the dorms."

The news caused Giles's to pace, his glasses now firmly back into place. "This is very worrying. But yes Willow this is probably the most likely of causes. Do you remember sensing any other demon present apart from Spike?"

"No, and that's another strange thing. Restfield is usually teeming with vampires and demons but last night, apart from Spike and me the only others there were the thankfully staying dead type."

Now that she thought about it, the more it sounded like a trap to her. God next time she saw that blonde pest he was dust there was no way anything was going to hold her back.

"Hmmm, well it still requires a lot more evidence and research but this does seem to be the most likely cause of events"

"Damn straight. Next time I see him, he's dust" Buffy growled out.

"I strongly advise caution Buffy. Whoever Spike has got working for him is obviously very powerful" Giles warned. "I'll do some more research… ah perhaps after some tidying up" He smiled sheepishly.

"Sure thing Giles's my man, we'll just get out of your way and let you get on with things" Xander said already beginning to edge to the door.

"Actually Xander, Willow. I could use your assistance here, if you would be so kind"

"Sure Giles, what needs done?" Willow perked up the thought that maybe she would be able to help.

"Can you head over to the library and see if the internet turns up anything like we've seen?"

"Course, I can so do that"

"And I'll head over with her to help" Xander said hopefully.

"No I will require your help here Xander. To help me go through these books"

Xander groaned as he looked at all the books that were scattered around, lining shelves and hiding in dusty corners.

"And Buffy…"

"Whoa, no can do Giles. I've got an essay to write." Buffy said stopping Giles before he could even finish his sentence.

"How is it I find you've always got essays to write nowadays" Giles sighed.

"The demands of college" she smirked before cheeringly waving at Xander who glared in response, and disappearing out of the door with a giggling Willow.

* * *

**To be continued in chapter 3: Night blind**


End file.
